James Taylor
“My first successful song was ‘Fire and Rain,’ which starts with losing a friend to suicide. There’s a cumulative emotional quality to it, a message that’s useful to hear. Why do people sing the blues? It’s because it helps to share it with other people and to expiate it—to have it out in front of you. What you always hope for as a songwriter is that your way of manifesting your emotions will be useful to other people. But, generally, we don’t engage with things that are hard. In modern culture, do we go too far in the direction of never doing anything that’s unpleasant? It’s almost like we’re entitled to not having negative feelings. I’m 71, and when you get older you lose more and more. Your accumulated memory and personal history are a huge compensation, but you have fewer people to share that with. Maybe cumulative loss is what old age is.”
—Taylor is a singer-songwriter. ‘Break Shot,’ his Audible Originals memoir, is out now; ‘American Standard,’ his new album, is out February 28.
Tara Westover
“It’s hard if you live on the coasts to understand why people in other parts of the country are so angry, but their rage is a response to a loss that they are experiencing, the loss of a whole way of life. In the last 30 years, it has accelerated with the internet, with e-commerce, processes that began with the railroads and highways. We’re increasingly segregating ourselves by religion, race, income, jobs. I changed a lot. I’m not a believing Mormon anymore; I’ve gone to a lot of school; I’m estranged from several members of my family. There was a long time where I felt a lot of hostility—maybe even embarrassment—about who I’d been. But you try to maintain all the links that take you back. You can still change, but not necessarily break faith with who you used to be.”
—Westover is a writer, a historian and the author of the bestseller ‘Educated: A Memoir.’
Siddhartha Mukherjee
“In 1900, the life expectancy at birth was 47; in 2000, it was 75. When loss was an expected part of your life, you created an emotional bulwark against it. Now when I see patients, their sense of loss is aggrieved somewhat because our culture has become progressively obsessed with immortality. I ask patients to think not about ends but means. I try to discuss very openly what their fears are. Is it a fear of pain? Is it a fear of being forgiven or forgiving someone? There’s no magic formula to get rid of grief, but the best clinicians practice the art of medicine, not just the science. The image of the doctor as a stoic figure is incorrect. I try to find ways to help fulfill my terminal patients’ unfulfilled goals. If you can’t attend your daughter’s graduation, what can you do that is closest to that? I might encourage them to have a ceremony—a private one.”
—Mukherjee is a Pulitzer Prize–winning author and an associate professor of medicine at New York’s Columbia University Irving Medical Center.
Amanda Levete
“We’re living in very difficult and uncertain times, and with that comes a loss of confidence in the future. In architecture—and in many other disciplines— it causes us to retreat into what we know and what feels familiar, which means it’s not so easy to explore or take risks, even when those risks might open fantastic possibilities. So how can we get that back? For us, it’s been through research, like using nanotechnologies to alter the properties of wood, to make it stronger and more insulative. There’s been a loss of public space we’re working on, too. As a society, we’re more isolated than we’ve ever been, and public spaces have a heightened importance and meaning. People want to be with people. But I’m also motivated by the legacy of my former partner Jan [Kaplický]’s optimism, which is always with us. There isn’t such a thing as loss because you can hold onto and build on it.”
—Levete is a Stirling Prize–winning architect and the principal of AL_A.
Tyler “Ninja” Blevins
“Adidas had this performance thing where they took my saliva, heart rate and cortisol levels throughout a day of playing videogames. When I started to lose a lot, my stress levels started to skyrocket. If you’re not performing in my line of work—when people are watching you for your talent—it can be really stressful. When I was younger, I would be thinking about the money on the line; but the more experienced you get, the better you are at learning how to focus. When I’m streaming, I can say, ‘I just got beat right here, and here’s why.’ The more times you get defeated, the more opportunities you can actually teach your audience. You learn more when you lose than when you win. You just try not to get completely tilted when things are out of your control. You can still change the fate of the game.”
—Blevins is a professional gamer; he recently left Twitch, where he hosted the platform’s most-followed channel, and now streams on Mixer.
Alexandra Cousteau
“My children could be the generation of my family to write the obituary for the ocean. We need to shift gears from a conservation mind-set to a restoration agenda and see this moment in time as an opportunity to restore lost abundance, to regenerate our oceans, to rebuild the abundance that we’ve lost. Scientifically, it’s still possible. There’s great opportunity to rebuild our oceans, but we need to be investing in science, investing in new technologies. We invest more in going to Mars than we invest in protecting our home planet. When my grandfather [Jacques-Yves Cousteau] started exploring the oceans in the 1950s and ’60s, they were diverse. They were thriving and rich. Fast-forward to today: We’ve lost 50 percent of the productivity of our oceans; 50 percent is lost of 70 percent of our planet. Our generation is the last that can save us. We don’t talk only about loss. We talk about restoration.”
—Cousteau is an explorer and an ocean advocate.
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